The Things They Say

Overheard in the local Post Office from man on crutches:

'I was doing the Elvis Presley thing at the end of the show and it just popped out.'

Overheard at the local KwikiMart:

Mother: 'No I won't let you share my drink.'
Daughter: 'Why not?'
Mother: 'Because you kiss boys. They have worms. You should kiss girls more often.'