Honest; they really made that announcement as I was cueing to leave Bali. I just love hot countries. I was OK because I'd left my assult weapons at home.
Apart from that there was nothing really exceptional about the place. Hot, humid, swollen legs, fat people on the plane, cheap hotel, cheap food, cheap taxis, cheap DVD's etc. The DVD's were interesting - $1NZ for DVD's which weren't even relased in America yet! American Gangster is released on 19 February but I bought it for $1 on 20 January along with a bunch of others:) I tried them all on my computer in the shop and they worked perfectly. The DVD's were bought in a 'normal' shop but the market places are, of course, where these countries excel. Wonderful, colourful, chaotic, busy, maze-like stalls crammed on top of each other and 'manned' by small children with probably more business nous than many CEO's.
Good conversations in restaurants - 'Baby snapper' was on the menu. 'Is that a big baby snapper?" I asked. 'No, not big baby; medium baby.'
I rented a car and driver for 8 hours for the equivalent of $50NZ/$38CAD. The price was all-in; no petrol costs, the driver paid for his own meals etc. The car was crap; no aircon and the only way I could get one of the non-adjustable seatbelts to feel right was by using one from the back seat while I was in the front seat. The driver spoke almost no english but asked if he could bring his wife along for the day, 'Sorree, she sit in back. Sorree, she no move. Sorree.' And, as far as I know, she didn't move the whole day; when I went shopping or being a tourist the driver was wandering around to greet me when I returned but she was always sitting exactly where we'd left her in the back.
I visited a temple and, because I was wearing shorts, I had to borrow a sarong. There were lots of people in borrowed sarongs but all of them reached just below the knee so the lower legs were still bare. Ganesha, the Hindu God, must think knees are subversive. I do know people with decidely subversive knees but I don't think mine are.
One of the touristy things I did on the car drive was watch a 'Barong & Kris Dance'. According to the information:The Barong - Play represents an eternal fight between good and evil spirit. Barong (a mythological animal) represents a good spirit and Rangda (a mythological monster) represents an evil one.
So Star Wars, eh? It was B.A.B.S except for the bits where 1) the nose of one guy is bitten off by a tiger, 2) a witch 'enters' two servants to make them angry, 3) the God Siwa gives Sadewa (son of the interestingly named Dewi Kunti)immortality which means the mythological monster (Rangda) can't kill and eat him but gets killed instead. Rangda then goes to Heaven which is a salutory lesson for us all, and 4) best of all, they mimic sticking bamboo poles up the rectum of a monkey and tickling its testicles which produces a huge erection with a vivid red end. Good job it was a costume and not a real monkey!
There were five acts and in the third I swear one of the characters forgot his words but as it was all in Bahasa I'm only guessing. The whole thing was so amatuerish it reminded me of a Pace Egg play back in northern England. With the tin band and the shouting players it was a fine demonstration of cacophony.
I also called in at the Forest of Monkeys. Sounds good but, hey, a monkey eating a banana is a monkey eating a banana.
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